Hi Shawn, I'm Mary Grace's high school friend... Thank you for "Hi, Chuck" - 1st of 3 updates:
FIRST POST about what I found out:
Peering into a space looking to learn a date. Finding that and also stumbling into an opening of a world I once knew, and, one I had yet to meet.

There's a jumble of thoughts careening within my head with many popping up saying "pick me! pick me!”, I'll begin and see how it unfolds.

I'm in the midst of semi-organizing a ‘big number' high school reunion, Ok, it's my 50th, (what can I say! I skipped a lot of grades, hahaha, not really.)

With my database of collecting names and curious where my former classmates had wandered to over the years, I've been in touch with the alumni director of my school to see where we may have overlap in contact info. Privacy matters and I'm sure not to share anything that may impinge on another's desire to not be contacted.

We first covered those who had died. Sorry to say, my list was longer than hers - I had thirteen and she had just one. As I prepared this section to share with the school, one of the names, my friend Mary Grace, I realized didn't have a date. She was one of the earliest to go, having lost her battle with breast and bone marrow cancer long ago. These earlier deaths didn't have readily available online obits so it took a bit more digging. I finally found the date: May 17, 2002.

I became curious where her two sons are today. They were in grade school and junior high school at the time of her death. Where did life lead them?

A few more computer clicks and there they were.

As I found them, I fell into a dream-like state as I was amidst her eldest's son, Shawn's, website with his musical compositions that he performed or were being performed by others. Her younger son, Joshua, had been making his way as a studio drummer and in recent years had gone out on his own with original percussion compositions.

On Shawn's website is a work called "Hi, Chuck”. I recall that his dad's name is Chuck and I was curious about it.

What I learned next is that after Mary Grace, his mom, died, his father, Chuck, shared a tape recording that she had made in 1990. This tape recording became the genesis of Shawn's musical work crafting this into the centerpiece of this biographical musical piece.

Mary Grace, was one of my closets friends in high school. We kept up through college through regular letter writing as this was years before the internet had moved into the mainstream. She moved to Oklahoma after college graduation to work in the VISTA program (Volunteers in Service to America) where she met her future husband, Chuck.

I learned in 1994, she was diagnosed with breast cancer. She was 39 years old.

MG (as she was also known) and I kept up over the years. In the early days of the internet, where she looked to find others who were sharing her current medical issues, I helped her navigate message boards, and made introduction to others, who were sharing their experiences about chemo, hair loss and bone marrow transplants.

MG recovered for a number of years after her bone marrow transplant and then succumbed to cancer in 2002. She was 47.

Why does all this matter now?

I spent the past two days listening to Shawn's creation that uses his mother's recorded voice in this searingly personal and inventive musical work.

Hearing her voice cadences brought flashing memories of time we spent together - laughing, talking, remembering, hoping and dreaming about our futures.

Shawn performed a portion of his "Hi, Chuck” in Louisville KY a few years ago.

Attached is a snippet of the recording.

"Hi, Chuck” by Shawn Jaeger recorded live in Louisville, KY, August 22, 2021
https://www.facebook.com/classicallouisville/videos/542208710339252

Shawn is due back in Louisville later this month to fully perform the piece.
https://www.lpm.org/classical/2023-08-02/an-audio-diary-becomes-multimedia-performance-on-new-lens

I've learned he lives in Brooklyn NY and teaches at the Bard College in Annandale-on-Hudson, NY and is their Department Chair in Composition & Musicianship.

So, where does this leave me now?

I'm looking for old letters (I have found two, so far) from Mary Grace. One is from 1996, two years after her first cancer diagnosis and treatment. She sounds hopeful that she is on a good path forward and talks about her two young sons, Shawn is just entering middle school and Joshua is in 2nd grade. She fills me in how she is back in school for her next level degree to support her role in the Louisville KY school system. In her note, she hopes to be done with her degree (doctorate) in the year 2000.

She made it and got her degree in 2000.

She died in 2002.
Shawn is 17. His brother, Joshua,13.

Shawn tells this tale through his music and the snippets of the tape recording.

Not sure if this will mean anything to anyone else. Since MG and I spent so much time together in our teen years, memories of her are marbled into me.

I have Shawn's email and I intend to write to him soon. I'm looking for other letters and photographs - the ones before the internet and smart phones - that I know I have tucked away in storage boxes. There are photos of Mary Grace along with Shawn and Joshua at very young ages when they would travel East to visit her family in New Jersey.

Seems the next right thing to do is to find them and share with this artist about his mother's influence on others. On me.

2nd of 3 UPDATES:
Hi Shawn, I'm Mary Grace's high school friend, Thank you for "Hi, Chuck”

Email copy:
Hello Shawn,

Your mother, Mary Grace, was one of my dearest friends at Morris Catholic high school in Denville NJ from 1974. I remember when she transferred in as a sophomore from her school in Delaware and we became friends.

On Tuesday, I discovered your website and your "Hi, Chuck” musical creation with your mother's voice.
https://www.shawnjaeger.com/hi-chuck

I listened to the entire piece on Tuesday and Wednesday.

It deeply stirred many emotions. I last heard Mary Grace's voice in the year 2000 when she came to visit me and my husband in our home in Yonkers, NY.

Deep memories and emotions.

Thank you for sharing her with us through your creation.

I'm writing for a few reasons:

- to let you know how deeply grateful I am for this gift of your work
- to share memories, including when I attended your parents' wedding in 1980; meeting you and your brother, Joshua, in NJ as youngsters, when you'd visit your NJ relatives
- her letters to me over the years; some from the late 1990s when her cancer appeared
- Like your mom, I too, was an early computer / internet adopter. We connected in searching for internet topic boards on cancer treatment journeys. I introduced her to a friend in NY who had gone through a bone marrow transplant too so they could share each other's experiences.
- If you're open to it, I'd welcome having a phone call, zoom session or in-person get together to share more about your mom.
I understand from your website that you reside in Brooklyn, NY.

I'm located in Yonkers, NY just north of NYC.

I'm in Manhattan often and it would be easy to get there if you'd be interested in meeting for a coffee get-together, walk about, etc.

I have included two photos from Mary Grace's and my high school yearbook.

One is of the two of us in the yearbook.

Given our last names began with "M” and "N”, we were in the same homeroom class along with appearing alphabetically, near each other in our 1973 yearbook.

The other includes Mary Grace's graduation sentiment to me.

She wrote across a picture of a bicycle in the yearbook. I used to organize long distance bicycle trips (aka hosteling) and your mom joined me for one of them our junior year.

Reading it for the first time again, in many years, it feels prescient.

The writing disappears a bit on the photo, so I've included the words as she wrote them across the photo in June 1973.
======
{Cursive writing from Mary Grace (MG) to Joyce that appears across photo of bicycle}
Oh Joyce:

Thank you - for your listening ear,

hosteling trips

happy smile

deep soul

and joyful - truly

joyful way of

life.

See you in the

here - after,

MG
========
I see from your website you will be performing the entire sonic memoir "Hi, Chuck” live in Louisville this coming Sunday evening, August 13th. Wonderful to know.

You can reach me at this email or via text on my mobile

Thank you.

Kind regards,

Joyce


3 of 3 UPDATE:
Wednesday, August 9, 2023

After my concern how my note to Shawn would land about his departed mother, the following morning, this note appeared in my inbox,

Dear Joyce,

Thank you so much for getting in touch, and for listening to Hi, Chuck. I was so moved to receive your email, especially since my performance is coming up (after several years of planning), and so I've been thinking a lot about my mother.

It's incredible to see that yearbook photo and my mother's note to you. wow! Yearbook sentiments are, by nature, brief, but I'm struck by the elliptical, poetic quality of it. It does feel prescient, as did her cassette tape when I first heard it. it has a strange, valedictory quality because it's so expansive and self-reflective. Or maybe that's just what one can't help but read into such things after a loved one passes away,

It would be great to meet you in Manhattan for a coffee or walk. I teach at an arts high school near Lincoln Center a few days a week, so I'm often in Manhattan, as well. I'm headed to KY soon, but I'm back in late-August before teaching resumes in September. Let's find a date that works—I've put my phone number below.

Thanks again for reaching out, and for listening to my music. It's really wonderful to connect with you.

Warmly,

Shawn
=====
I am relieved. When you are the only one who has information about an important person in another's life, it is a power. Power to do what? Power to enlighten, transform - or the opposite. I am glad my information landed well.

I am looking into if Shawn's performance this Sunday in Louisville, Kentucky will be live streamed. I'd like to be there - at least virtually - for the performance.

Either way, he and I will connect in September when he's back in the NYC area.

Until then, knowing I have in my own way, reconnected mother and son, many years after, is enough.